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Episode 56 – Kim | My Body. My Story PODCAST| 45 Over 45 chapter


LISTEN TO THE EPISODE:

In this episode, you will learn 10 FACTS about Kim and what she thinks about perfect body image, positive changes and challenges of 45+ women, what is it for her to feel good and look beautiful, and what advice she would give younger women and 30-year-old self!


You can READ the interview transcript HERE


 

10 Facts About Kim

(at the time of the project)


1. 53 years old. Kim was born in 1969, the same year that they walked on the moon.

2. Kim looks and sounds Australian, but she was born in New Zealand. Her mum travelled there and met Kim’s dad and they got married. And they were only there for four years.

3. Kim has older sister and younger brother. After moving back to Sydney, they lived with Kim’s grandpa in Cronulla.

4. Kim has always had chickens for pets. And every house she’s had, had chickens. Now, Kim has got Ameraucana chickens, which have a blue shells egg.

5. Kim has been married two times and has 3 kids – 2 sons and a daughter.

6. Kim is a primary school teacher.

7. Kim played chess since she was four years old. And she has been running the chess club for two years at school.

8. Kim has just recently discovered a love for gardening, which is something she thought before was quite boring. It happened when Kim found all these amazing rare native fruits in her garden. She has discovered about 50 native rainforest trees in the backyard. They were planted by Evan Weatherhead who was a president of the Glenbrook native plant reserve and used to live at the house Kim lives now. Her favourite one is the finger lime tree.

9. The biggest challenge at this age – “The knowledge that you're getting closer to dying. I found myself in the last few months counting how many years I've got left and thinking of all the things that I want to do before that happens.”

10. Positive change with age – “I'm much easier with myself, more self-accepting and I have learned to be more assertive”


Watch Kim’s VIDEO interview HERE


 

INTERVIEW TRANSCRIPT

(auto-generated)


Hi, you're listening to My Body My Story podcast.


The little kiddies play like the little girls act as their parents at play slow mo often, they will act diet, dieting behaviours, and they'll say to their friends in Hong Kong, oh, I can't eat, they will make me fat. I'm on a diet or whatever. And I think and they are three years old.


This is the 45 or 45 chapter where we celebrate rule breakers and role models, the women who inspire us to live life our way and to show that sensuality, beauty, soul and true essence. Here we talk about what it's like to be 45 Plus, adjusting to the changes that come with time, and will listen to the stories of our participants. If you have an interesting story to share, we would love you to participate, you can email us on info@aleksandrawalker.com or visit our website, www. aleksandrawalker.com


Hi, everyone, and welcome to My body. My Story project and today with us Kim in the studio. Hi, Kim, welcome to the studio.


Hi.


And while she's sitting in the makeup chair, and Citra is doing makeup for her. I'll be asking her a few questions. Tell us a bit about yourself.


Okay. I do look and sound Australian, but I was actually born in New Zealand. My mum travelled there and met my dad and they got married. And we were only there for four years. So my mama had three kids, my oldest sister, me and my younger brother. And then they separated and we moved back to Sydney to live with my grandpa in Cronulla.


Wow, that's a nice area.


And second fact is that I've always had chickens for pets. So when I was growing up, my mum always had chickens. And every house I've had I've had chickens because I think they're useful animals and you feed them and they lay your eggs which has been very helpful during lockdown.


leaving the house and you have a chicken.


Yeah, I always have a chicken coop in the backyard. Yeah. And it's they're just lovely. The sound of them is lovely. And cleaning their eggs is part of my routine and just having fresh eggs all the time. And at the moment, I've got Ameraucana chickens, which are interesting because I have a Blue Shield egg, which is yeah, very, very interesting.


I have a third fact is that I have three kids. So I have two children, Harry and Hannah to Peter, who was my first husband. And then I had another relationship after that relationship ended and we had another child who's Joshua will the fourth back which I've already covered, I've been married two times. First, Peter, who I'm still good friends with. And then Marty is my current husband.


I'm 53 years old. So I was born in 1969, the same year that they walked on the moon.


Oh, nice fact.


Even though it looks like I am I've got red hair, but that's not a natural colour. I've actually got dark brown hair naturally. So I'm pretty much 100% Grey, but I've been dyeing my hair since I was about 25 years old, the same colour so I sort of feel natural redheaded, but some ladies get annoyed at me because they say well, we you didn't have to get teased at school. We'll get teased at school and you just have the glory of the red hair when you're adult. But you didn't have to put up with all the teasing when you were young. Yeah. Keep that. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, it's actually it's a it's an odd because I've got blue eyes in the red here, which is a very, very naturally rare combination. So generally, blue eyes does not go with red hair. I think it's like point 2% of the popular point zero 2% of the population.


So anyway, the next point is that I'm a primary school teacher, I started off as an early childhood teacher and the wages are very bad. So just recently, I just did an extra year and retrained as a primary teacher, which I've been enjoying. So I grew up in Cronulla. And I didn't grow up with my dad. I didn't see him at all. When I was growing up. I think I've had probably when I was growing up, I had two contacts with him. So that led to some emotional issues I had when I was younger of rejection when I was in relationships and things but I don't have any hard feelings or anything. And mom did a really good job. And it's interesting. Anyway, I won't go into that. But anyway, the next point is I have played chess since I was four years old. And I run a chess club at school. And I've been running the chess club for two years, and I've been beaten by one kid once. So that's pretty good odds. And like he's in his 60s Quite an exceptional chess player. So I'm really good at it.


And probably love this Netflix show.


Oh yes. The Queen's game, but yeah, I did love that. Yeah, I watched it a lot. Yeah, I thought it was amazing. And then after I saw the movie, I bought the book and read the book as well. Yeah. I have I have a massive scar on my stomach which is probably why I won't be wearing any sexually lingerie for the photoshoot because when I was two I, my appendix ruptured, and I got rushed to hospital and I had my appendix out. But it's not a nice little appendix scar, like some people have got, it's like a big cut right down my stomach. And that's something that's 10 points.


Yeah. Very nice. Very nice. So what are you most passionate about?


My kids. So my daughter is 22. And she's studying science at uni. My son Harry, who's 24. And he is a disability support worker. And he lives close by. And Joshy. Yeah, so I heard someone say once, when you have kids, it's like pulling a little piece of your heart and putting it on legs. So pretty much every time they succeed, you feel successful. And when they fail, you feel like you've failed somewhat. So luckily for me, or my kids are very happy, successful people. So I feel at peace with them and their choices. And the relationship I have with me is all good.


Yeah, it's important. It's like kind of I know, it shouldn't. But it's kind of validate us as mothers, you know, that. Our kids are all good, you know, and good people. But I think also for those parents who have problems with kids. It's not always 100% our fault.


Yeah. But it's always nice to have we call it go good kids. Yes. It is very hard. And a few of my friends have kids. And, you know, they can I mean, my son was never perfect. He had a few issues when he was growing up, too. But it does it really, I'm quite good at, I feel contented that I did everything I could when the kids were little. So I don't feel guilty, really, that I don't feel like I you know, didn't give them enough food or that I didn't spend enough time with them. Or I really have no guilt. So when they make wrong choices, I actually don't take it upon myself and blame myself, whereas a lot of my friends will blame themselves when their kids have issues. And often I'll say to them, well, it's not your fault. You know, that's their choice. They're adult enough now, but they continue to blame themselves for their kids shortcomings. And I think well, it's really they like that. And you know, I have heard someone say once that love covers a multitude of wrongdoings and I think if you can just love your kids and they feel that love. Really, that's all you can do for them. And after that it's their knee. It's up to them. It's their destiny. Yeah. So yeah, kids definitely number one.


And I love dancing. You were talking before about your Chinese dancing life at all. I love watching Dancing, being part of dance and going out dancing. So my mum was a folk dance teacher when I was growing up. So we spent a lot of our evenings and weekends going to folk dance festivals and you know, folk dancing with the old people. And so that's always been something that I've enjoyed. As long as it's not too choreographed. I don't prefer more free dancing than structured dancing. So still, now me my girlfriend's often I'll go out on the weekends just so we can get a good dance in. And one of my good girlfriends is a singer in a band. So I will often go and watch her sing. And just recently, her daughter is also a good singer. So we did a road trip, which was really exciting down to South Coast and spent the weekend listening to live music, which was amazing. So lots of dancing.


And I love going to the beach and swimming in the ocean.


And I'm just recently I've discovered a love for gardening, which is something that my mum always do when I was growing up, but I thought was quite boring. But just in the two years ago, when COVID started, I found all these amazing fruits on the ground. I've got a quite a large backyard and I used to annoy me I used to go out there and it was all the big trees were blocking the sun. And I'm like I used to say to my husband, our trees are so annoying because they blocking the sun and we couldn't get solar panels. And then once I went out the backyard, and I found all these beautiful red fruits on the ground. So I googled the fruits, and I found out there was this rare native tamarind tree. Yeah, and there's only four of them left in the wild. And I was like, Oh my goodness. So I tasted it was a very tough fruit, but it's very good for making jams. I started making jams and chutneys with it. And um, since then I've discovered all these other amazing red trees in my backyard. So the guy that lived at the house before me was a native gardener and he was the president of the Glenbrook native nursery. And I've been there heaps since because I sort of thought following in his legacy a little bit and his name was Evan Weatherhead. So I'm Googled him and I've found all these plugs all over the garden. So what I've tried to do is match up the names of the trees with the plaques. I've discovered about 50 native rainforest trees in the backyard. So I've got a big macadamia nut tree and so I don't know because I've been living there for 16 Nice. So my girlfriend ISIS, um, I don't know how you didn't know these trees were there. And I'm like, I just didn't. I was so busy. You know, working and everything. I didn't go out into the backyard that much. But yeah, so that's been a real joy. So I've the whole COVID weeding and moving mulch and researching about the native plants. And my favourite one is the finger lime. I don't know who ever seen the finger lime, because all the Ozzie bushtucker is coming back in. And so I've got all these established bushtucker plants already. So the finger lime is like a native citrus and it's got a little caviar shaped citrus balls inside it. So I've got about 20 of those in my yard. So and they actually sell for over $100 a kilo. So that's a bit exciting. I thought when I'm retired, I can go into business selling finger lime or native Australian produce,


or what was the society's story, and I should have started like YouTube channel and you know, blog about that. Yeah.


Yeah, I've been putting a lot on Facebook, and I've had a lot of interest. And lots of my friends have come and had garden tours and things like that.


Yeah. So I'm just wondering that if someone wants to, do you have any group or information


well, the Evan Weatherhead, who's the guy who used to live at the house, he planted all the trees. He is members of his native nursery, which is run by volunteer people. So I will go there is only open twice a week. So I go there. And they have actually asked me if they could do a garden tour. And I've said yes, so Yeah.


You mentioned before we spoke that you live in Blue Mountain.


Yeah, that's right. Yeah. So it seems like sun Yeah, it's a really big jacket. So pretty much I've got a mini rainforest in my backyard. We'd like all these rare Australian trees. And one of them is like it, like critically endangered in New South Wales.


So wow, what an interesting story. Yeah.


Because I think what happens is people build houses, and they just knock all the treatment of Native trees down. Whereas even because it was so conscious is you know, he's, he's planted all these amazing trees. So you just bought house from him? Well, he had passed away. So we bought the house from his wife. Okay. Yeah, yeah. And he was very passionate. There's lots of stuff on the internet about him. And he's written all these articles for native magazines and stuff. So yeah, it's been and I feel a little bit a little bit like I would like to carry his legacy on. So both of my neighbours have told me about him and said that I use always have garden tours, and people always be walking through there, through the garden and that sort of thing. So yes, that's interesting. Then I went to the native nursery and the gates have got a plaque there, because the gates have been named after him, too. So.


Wow. I love this story.


Thank you. Oh, so I feel very blessed actually. And I feel every time I start a garden, I find a new plan. I sort of look up to the sky, and I go, Oh, thanks, Evan, for planning that plan, like 30 years ago, now I'm reaping the benefits of his hard work pretty much.


Excellent. So let's move to our age. And what positive change? Have you noticed in experience with this age turning 45 Plus?


Um, well, there's a few things. I think when you're younger, you're quite hard on yourself if you make a mistake, and you can be quite embarrassed if you do the wrong thing. Or if you say the wrong thing. And as an adult, I'm much easier with myself and I just will laugh or if I fall over, I think it's funny. Or if I say the wrong thing, I'll like, I don't dwell on it. and think, oh, I should have done it this way, or just much more self accepting. And, and I have learned to be more assertive, I'm naturally quite a peacemaker by nature. And, you know, if someone says, What do you do? I'll say, What do you want to do? So I've learned to actually find out how and how to be more assertive, especially in my marriage relationships. And, and with my children to my daughter's quite um she's got a very strong personality, and we did clash when she was a teenager. I think there's a stage when your daughter's about 13, where they become their own people, and it can be quite hard. Yes, I've learned to be more assertive with her, but she's the hardest person I find to be assertive with for some reason.


So what is the biggest challenge at the moment? Related to the age?


Yes. So relating to the age? Well, do you know what I think it's getting closer? The knowledge that you're getting closer to dying? Okay, so I found myself in the last few months counting how many years I've got left and thinking of all the things that I want to do before that happens. So just recently, I bought a house at the beach. Now, I've always wanted to live at the beach, but because I'm thinking, Okay, I've got five years I have to until I can move there and I'm thinking well, that only leaves me maybe 20 years that I can actually live there and then you know, that's that's sort of a sobering sort of thought. So when I was young I've sort of always had an extremely sick fear of death. And I remember when I was young, I'd go to my mum's room and I'd say on my Mum, what's going to happen when I die? And I always wanted her to say, you know, there's a heaven or something lovely is going to happen. But she'd always tell me that no, I don't know when there's nothing I can tell you. So never really satisfied my fear. So yeah, anyway, so I think yeah, that's something that makes me feel scared at this age, because you're getting closer to the inevitable, inevitable death. Yeah. And I love life. And I think I don't you know, I don't like the thought of it ending and how can the world go on without me in it?


Yeah, I think it's the biggest fear of all, you know, the fear of death.


But some people don't seem to care. Like I asked my husband sometimes do you? And he just says, Well, look, you just have to accept that that's just part of life.


That doesn't mean that he's not afraid of tha